I used to be an Account guy.

Now I’m not.

Duke Basketball fan (not sorry).

Dad to the world’s dumbest dog, Rootbeer (less sorry).

My favorite movie is Fight Club (extremely sorry).

Some writing-adjacent experiences of mine:

- I was called onstage at a Whose Line Is It Anyway? tour show to play a game with the cast. It was improv but I like to think that my brain pre-writes everything my mouth says, so it counts.

- I sang the National Anthem at a Duke-UNC basketball game. It wasn't on TV but I swear it happened. I also didn't write the National Anthem, but only because that one guy beat me to it.

- I wrote a 30-page academic paper on The Daily Show and The Colbert Report and later got to discuss it with an executive producer of both shows. He said my thesis was "quite wrong."